feministbecky:

peroquevaina:

(I like that this has no gender pronouns, too.)

I like that the person asking for sex isn’t pissed off.

Yeah the lack of gender is a nice change with these sort of things.

(Source: geekstuffandranting)

247,567 notes

andrewthepoet:

One time I went on a date to the Olive Garden and I ordered the seafood pasta. I open up one of the muscle oyster things and low and behold there is a tiny crab in there. I freak out and think it’s the craziest thing ever. I keep talking to my then girlfriend about this tiny crab. How hilariously wonderful it is that the little dude crawled in there in the ocean only to become a freaky little part of my pasta. She is very unamused and clearly wants me to shut the hell up about this tiny crab and be a normal person. She is 0% excited about the tiny crab. 
The waitress comes over eventually and is like ‘hey how’s the meal?’ and I’m like ‘awesome, but you gotta check this out! i found a tiny crab in here!’ and waitress freaks out and thinks its awesome. And she is like ‘can I take this to show everyone else?’ and I’m all like ‘hells yeah.’ So she does and everyone else that works there thinks it’s awesome.
Girlfriend SUPER annoyed.
The End.

andrewthepoet:

One time I went on a date to the Olive Garden and I ordered the seafood pasta. I open up one of the muscle oyster things and low and behold there is a tiny crab in there. I freak out and think it’s the craziest thing ever. I keep talking to my then girlfriend about this tiny crab. How hilariously wonderful it is that the little dude crawled in there in the ocean only to become a freaky little part of my pasta. She is very unamused and clearly wants me to shut the hell up about this tiny crab and be a normal person. She is 0% excited about the tiny crab. 

The waitress comes over eventually and is like ‘hey how’s the meal?’ and I’m like ‘awesome, but you gotta check this out! i found a tiny crab in here!’ and waitress freaks out and thinks its awesome. And she is like ‘can I take this to show everyone else?’ and I’m all like ‘hells yeah.’ So she does and everyone else that works there thinks it’s awesome.

Girlfriend SUPER annoyed.

The End.

293,765 notes

heyfunniest:

School of Rock appreciation post

(Source: caughtinbetween10and20)

270,293 notes

gonah:

coffee-beans-and-charlie-sheen:

Modern Updates on 90’s Cartoons

Artist: Isaiah Stephens

So cool

7,275 notes

the-whisper-men:

poppunkbrittatl:

This weeks American hero. 

When I first saw this post I thought the man accidently wore the same outfit everyday for two years and i didn’t understand what was going on

(Source: pleatedjeans)

387,584 notes

shaunofthebread:

The greatest Twitter exchange of all time.

18,287 notes